Author Archives: Anna

PMS & new focus

Today is a very cold day in Stockholm. Snow. No snow bears, however. Yesterday something weird happened to me. I was going for training and suddenly I changed my mind. For a second I thought that I can continue training anyway because it will make me feel good. But I needed time for reflexion. I am currently changing my life and that is difficult.

New focus in life. I feel both happy and a little sad. I have had a lot of focus on my body and that has generated results that I am happy about. But. That also means that my clothes do not fit anymore. Like the lyrics of “Streets of Philadelphia”. I need to find new clothes. Fun but a lot of work. I like clothes a lot. That is a way of expressing yourself. I like watching trends. Personally, my style is not so trendy 🙁

I like France a lot. The way you dress. It is in a way, more allowed to be female compared to Sweden. To wear dresses. To wear skirts and so on.

Dare to be female!

When I was in France I learnt a lot about languages. To taste a word. To have a word and see different pieces of it. To understand that a word may be the same in several languages. At least parts of it. Enclosure is an example of a very interesting word. A lot of history connected to that word. English 1800 century  history, if I remember right. It is also connects church and religion. Things you don´t talk about. Only whisper. Contradictions; like nun and opposite.

Humanism is also a very interesting word.

Nature is beautiful when it comes to how culture has developed. Sometimes I think about how languages have evolved. Languages can make you feel good. At least me. I smile every time I hear French. It is so beautiful.

C’est très jolie.

I like the politeness in France. We need more of that in Sweden. Of course, I have bad days myself, but I always try to be polite. Maybe time is due to un-politeness in todays society. People have a lot of pressure. No time. But should that be an excuse?

I have a lot to do today. Working on my book. I write in Swedish. My native language. I have worked with this book now for several years and it will soon be ready. The biggest challenge has been to find a mode where I can write. To have my own style and language. I try to remind myself that time is precious.

That is my motto today: “time is precious”. Sounds beautiful. Sounds like French.

 

Wishing you a lovely day,

Anna

Weekend

I have visited my parents this weekend. Still a lot of snow but not enough for skiing. It is very fresh to stay in the countryside. Healthy. I went for a slow run today. I focus, maybe a little too much, on my body. But, I when I have reach my goal, I hope I can stay in that shape, and not exercise that much as I do now.

Ok. Will reveal that I need to loose visceral fat. The kind of fat you can so to say “hide”. This fat is the most dangerous fat that you can have. Not good for health at all. But once you (in this case that is me) have started to loose weight it is not easy to stop. It is fun to measure. To see that you can change. I still do not know what to do with my sweetie weakness. I can never have a life without chocolate. That is for sure. That is my pleasure.

I focus quite a lot on myself right now. But I think I deserve that. Finally, my mother is stable. Even though she has Alzheimer´s disease, she can live at home with my father. I feel I can let go of them for a while. My brother has a good life after his big accident so I feel a relief .

I can take care of myself for a while. I have been badly mistreated and really met evil. I know, for sure, that evil exists.

Sometimes I feel that this is expected. To take care of my parents and brother. I mean, I am single. Don´t have a family of my own. Then people think that I can take care of my parents and brother since I don´t have a life of my own. But I think I have right to have my own life.

I went for a skin care course a few days ago about REN. Got inspired and bought this. I spoiled myself. Skincare is important to feel good.

Have a nice evening.

Anna

 

 

Almost weekend

Life is getting easier. Soon April. Not so cold. Brighter days. I will just write a few words tonight. Thinking a lot of the beautiful and energizing run yesterday. I just had to stop for a some photos. To catch a few moments. Sweet moments of life.

Went for good exercise this evening. Maybe I am focusing to much on training but I like it a lot. Soon, when the weather allows, it will be nice to go for walks again.

Have a pleasant evening.

Anna

 

Opposite sex

Confession.

I am singel and have lived alone for several years. This is not fun. Not at all. However, life experience has thought me that this is the best of my choices. I hope I will find a nice man one day. Or rather the opposite. A man will find me. I have stopped searching. Somebody who cares about me. Men should go to school to learn how to treat a woman. It is so easy.

To be kind.

Kindness is not all. There has to be attraction. Like the laws of nuclear science. Electrons attract positrons that make love chemistry. Something you cannot put words on but might be explained by using mathematics. Complicated. An unsolved equation.

Love can never be forced. Probably only described in poems. That is beautiful. That is why I love Shakespeare. Have you watched the wonderful movie “Shakespeare in love”?

Yes. I have met men. And I don´t really know how to explain, but somehow they do not want me to be happy. To have a happy life. Even though it is over. Can you tell me why? To let go of me.

I feel good when I see people happy. People focusing on their own lives and not other lives.   The grass is always greener on the other side. Right or wrong?

Questions of life.

Love. Maybe the biggest question to understand in life. I am not sure I will ever have an answer. Most probably the answer will vary depending on time and environment. I´ll see if I can explain love in a poem. To catch the sentence. The spirit. The best way of explaining love.

Take care and have a nice day!

Anna

 

Stockholm

Rather late night. Stockholm was beautiful today. Such nice weather. I appreciate tiny pieces of life. Those are the best parts of life. Sometimes you just have to learn. Learn how to enjoy your daily life. Just because that is life. Not to think so much about future and to focus on right now. And not to forget that future is important. Just as history. Balance again. And again.

Ups and downs in life are also something to learn. How to handle “a not so good day”. Try to remember a good day. How it feels. And to keep that feeling.

I would like to write more. Writing has become a way of expressing myself. Long time since I wrote a poem. Soon again I hope. Time changes a lot. Or not?

All the best from Anna